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My thoughts and opinions on the psychological horror game 'In Sound Mind'

This is my page to ramble about video games, how I felt about them, if the story made sense (to me), etc. There are a few videogames I wish I could yell at everybody about, and some I just want to log my thoughts on, and some inbetween. They might end up here, or might not! When I get a logbook where you can write me messages, feel free to recommend games I play/watch other people play to record my thoughts on!

If you want to use this layout for yourself, at the bottom of the page is a link to the developer, OR you can click here for a link to the developers page!



In sound mind is a psychological horror game about a therapist going inside of his patients heads (LITERALLY) using audio tapes to try to figure out why and where he failed them. He isn't quite sure how he got there, all he knows is that he needs to figure out how to get out. But the only way out is through. If this sounds interesting to you, and you don't want to be spoiled, theres several playthroughs on youtube you can watch, feel free to pause and come back to this page anytime. TW for this game, as it IS a game featuring characters going to therapy for abuse, suicide, self harm, and animal death.

Spoilers begin...NOW. I really really enjoy In Sound Mind! To the point I have rambled about it to my boyfriend AND almost to tumblr. I'm going to be discussing each character in order of appearance, with Desmond and his inner demon being discussed last, as well as his cat.

The games name 'In Sound Mind' I really enjoy, like yes it's very surface level observation to go "haha the therapy game about making people move on from their traumas literally inside their head has the name in sound mind" but I really like that!! The songs also fit the theme of who they're for! But I'll get into that later when I discuss each character. I just really like this sort of thing- like how the cover art for '35mm the musical' is a turned over camera that looks like each of the photos the songs are about! The name too! I just really enjoy it lmao.

VIRGINIA RUHL/THE WATCHER

Virginia Ruhl is probably someone who had been being abused throughout life, at the very least through neglect. Her parents seemed to not care for her very much, or at the very least her mom didn't. I say this because Virginia had been forced to go to a beauty pageant despite her face being severely (and traumatizingly recently) injured, making her go with FRESH injuries with no time to process, heal or accept what had happened to her. This trauma follows her into her adulthood, with a severe social phobia it seems (specifically of judgement and being stared at). In her apartment you can find notes from her mother asking her not to "beg" for money and that she doesn't want to encourage begging, and while I initially didn't really clock this as somewhat neglectful (or at least UNCARING and shitty on the moms part) the person I had been watching did. I will say I understand wanting to make sure your kid can live and thrive on their own, and to not become genuinely uncaring of trying to make it on their own and only ever ask people for money ALL the time, but it really isn't bad if they do need to ask for help! You choose to become a parent for life, you don't just dump your kid when they turn 18 or move out! Virginia is clearly someone whos struggling! I had wondered why make your kid move out if they struggle so much, but it seems Virginia had moved out for college, which definitely likely made things more difficult for her. There is a mention of room-mates interestingly, implying she lives in a dorm. I'm unsure if she's still in college when the story begins, as her file says she began mandatory therapy in college.

I can only imagine what Virginia had to deal with growing up, as going to pageants I hear can be stressful/traumatizing for some children as they have to navigate being bullied from fellow competetors or even PARENTS. Plus then having to go on stage after a SEVERE INJURY (it wouldn't shock me if she had a concussion to pair with everything else), which I think points to her mom caring more about her child winning/getting awards and seeming to be 'good' than actually caring for her child. Plus then going into highschool or elementary, with very judgemental teens/children/teachers, even if her face didn't scar very badly im sure a select few kids made sure to point out anything and everything they could. Note: when this incident occured, Virginia was six years old. Virginia becomes very nervous about going outside, relying on familiarity to ground her and make her feel safe. She enjoys going to the same small grocery store, which closes down and incites a spiral from her which Desmond tries to mitigate. Telling her it might not be that bad, and she should give it a go at least once and take small steps.

This probably would have been fine for Virginia, minus maybe a panic attack and leaving the store early (which aren't small things!), if not for the rainbow gas/liquid/agent rainbow. This incites a terrifying hallucination, and she attacks several staff and then ends it in the store. In Virginia's tape you have to go through the store of course, avoiding her and using mirrors to get her to leave you alone with the aid of the mannequins (staff). I did note that the basement and final place you fend her off has children's toys, balloons, and is very reminiscent of a pillow/blanket fort (a safe space for many children). I think Virginia never fully felt 'grown up' and mourns for a childhood she didn't get to properly have. She does sell her toys for money, so that could be part of it, but I can imagine how much that would hurt too. Selling the last pieces of your childhood to stay afloat because you cannot get a job due to your ptsd. Things I've noticed while rewatching the game is that the toy area in the supermarket has a lot of teddybears, and in Virginia's house on her bed is that same teddybear. These teddybears often have stuff like batteries, letter blocks, etc which are all helpful items. The teddybear is something special to her, comforting. You end up defeating 'The Watcher' in the basement by making her look at her reflection one final time, shattering her mask. You then find her crying and comfort her, telling her you see her. This gives Desmond determination to further figure out whats going on, at the very least for Virginia's sake.

Now, I don't think Virginia's mom is the world's most evil villain or anything but she wasn't the BEST parent either. She did try to tell Virginia people wouldn't judge her, that she was still pretty, but I don't think that's maybe what she should have told her child at the time. Especially not when she forced her kid to go to a BEAUTY PAGEANT with fresh stitches. I understand she still needed to attend school (it was the 1990's/80's if I recall correctly so no online school) but she didn't need to attend the pageant or store if she didn't want to while she was healing. I think the best thing should have been honesty with compassion also, things like "well, you aren't ugly for having scars. Plenty of people have scars, it's normal. You still deserve love and respect.", "People will probably have initial reactions to seeing your scars, and a lot of people might be cruel to you, but it doesn't make them right about you.", and "Being 'pretty' isnt everything, you can still be pretty with scars, and even if you don't think so thats okay. Because beauty isn't all there is to being a person." etc etc, I won't say im the best person to come to for these sorts of things either, but neutrality is easier to get to when you're low on yourself and is better than jumping for high self-esteem views right away. You can get to "You're pretty!" after neutrality is reached, it's a smaller jump.

PATIENT NOTES

Virginia's patient notes have a lot of information! I wrote the above paragraphs from memory and while rewatching gameplay, so this is my in-time reaction and thoughts on her patients notes.

Virginia began treatment in college because her room-mates were concerned about her hiding in her dormroom all the time, she was suspected of having suicidal ideation. When Virginia was in pageants (SIX YEARS OLD) Virginia would suffer verbal abuse about her appearance and performance. I am unsure if this was the other kids and adults or her mother, either way thats fucked up. I imagine even if she hadn't injured herself she would have grown up to have some sort of disorder regarding appearance. She only ended pageants after the bathroom mirror collapsed on her.

In PSYCHOLOGICAL NOTES it is stated Virginia had an unsupportive home environment, so it is likely Virginia's mother was part of the people verbally abusing her. Due to the judgement at home (what should have been a safe space) and everytime/the majority of her time outdoors she developed a fear of judgement (I think she has severe social phobia). She can't look in mirrors, again likely due to her mother. Theres nothing for me to personally comment on here aside from that I agree, and I think Virginia's mom sucks.

There are more notes about her having to go to a much more crowded store, which is true. The notes also state she had been feeling increased dread and anxiety/fear. I believe, somehow, she was infected with the rainbow gas (through the water, if my memory serves correct?) and the fear was a prelude before it fully kicked in, making her hallucinate in the store. Because the gas shows you your worst fear, and she was already struggling to handle her trauma, it's no wonder things ended up specifically this way. I have an anxiety disorder myself, and sometimes wish for the fear to just stop, so living through her WORST NIGHTMARE in an unfamiliar place must've been excrusiating.

VIRGINIA'S THEME - A DOLL'S HOUSE

"Remember, when you're young
You surrender to the world
Cry when sad or laugh when happy
So simple
We use to play with dolls
Go to the movies, or the mall
I remember how they told me
How they sold me, how I'm lonely

When the world came crashing down on me
I did not die, I went to sleep
I watch you as I am dreaming
Through the mist, I persist

You promised me a cure
Promised a life boat, and I'm sure
You're judgemental, like the others
Pretending
I trusted, let you in
Let you see through my broken skin
Let you tell me, people would love me
Not get sick of me
Get rid of me

When the world came crashing down on me
I did not die, I went to sleep
I watch you as I am dreaming
“Look away!”, I’m screaming
Oh, when the world came crashing down on me
I did not die, I went to sleep
I watch you as I am dreaming
Through the mist I persist

My scars they remain
My past and my pain
I would tell you all about it
If you’d listen"

In the game there is a doll's house you have to use in order to get to the basement by placing dolls of Virginia's family in specific places. Virginia's mother is cooking, her father is asleep by the fire, her brother is in the addic, and Virginia is in the bathroom with the smashed up mirror. It's clear why this song is titled 'A Doll's House' with that understanding, but on to the lyrics. The first paragraph seems to be about her childhood, how simple it felt and how easy. 'Cry when sad or laugh when happy', when you get older you get more complex in your response to certain things. I believe the 'we' in mentioning playing and going places is her family or at least her brother. I would imagine after the incident it became very hard to go outside or do these things without fear of judgement and being stared at.

I think the 'I remember how they told me' line is about several things at once. About her having to get stitches, how it would likely scar, having to go to the pageant anyway, that being her very last one, the likely insults she got AT the pageant, etc. 'How they sold me, how im lonely' I think is very much about the pageants. In a sense her mother was selling her privacy out for an award/prize money/her time (assuming she won any pageants throughout her time going), and how practicing for them/preparing took away time to make friends, socialize, or do fun activites she should have been able to do at this age.

I think the next segment about the world crashing down on her and then going to sleep is very very much about how her future was ruined and the person she was prior to the incident (capable of going outside and having fun) vanished with it. I know none of my observations have been ground-breaking so far but it's fine LMAO. I also think it's about her ending it in the store, because of her 'through the mist I persist', which she only really truly does after her death. Plus her "I watch you as i am dreaming, "Look away!" i am screaming" line. She does yell at you frequently to stop looking at her in the dreamworld, which makes me wonder if to VIRGINIA she was stuck in purgatory in a dream-like state? As you can find these cds in their mindworlds.

Obviously the segment about 'I let you see through my broken skin' is directed at Desmond, as he is/was her therapist. She had to let him in and tell him her traumas and fears. I have had similar thoughts as Virginia here, "You're judgemental, like the others." because that's just how it feels when you have a fear of judgement for ANY reason. Especially your therapist, because you tell them stuff you don't tell other people! I think her lines about 'Let you tell me people would love me/not get sick of me/get rid of me" are about family/ex-friends. It is very common for people to be empathetic and compassionate at the beginning of an awful event (such as a mirror falling on you, causing severe injury needing several stitches) but slowly lose patience if you dont get better at the rate THEY want you to. In Virginia's case, this would be her life-long fear of judgement and going outside, her inability to get a job both because of her fear and the bias of employers. This probably slowly grated on her parents as she wasnt recovering at the rate they'd hope she would, producing a cycle of being a poor foundation to even HELP her get better, and likely making it worse. You can find Virginia's Vinyl in her home.

VIRGINIA'S APARTMENT

Virginia's apartment is a very dimly lit, but nice home. Outside it is raining, I assume thats probably Virginia's favorite weather because not many people go out when it's raining, so she could go on a walk if she wanted to. In the kitchen is the note mentioned from before, mentioning a phone she never picks up (which you can find in her kitchen). Something of note is that her bed faces this big 'HOTEL' sign that beams light into her bedroom, I wonder if she sleeps well at all like that?

The next few paragraphs are where I ramble about my thoughts on the various songs used through Virginia's section, some are longer, some shorter, feel free to skip it. I don't think I have anything uber insightful to say about the Homa-Mart songs where it's mostly there for atmosphere.

VIRGINIA'S APARTMENT (SONG)

Virginia's Apartment is this very oppressive sounding song. It has this constant deep almost rumbling throughout, with occassional higher toned piano keys playing. This is clearly not a place she feels safe, and gives the feeling her mental state wasn't good either even in a place she should feel at least comfortable. I have noticed all songs in the game have components of the main theme, which I really enjoy. Even here, the higher pitched piano notes ARE the main theme, but specifically the beginning three notes.

TEMPORARILY CLOSED

Temporarily Closed most clearly features elements from the main theme, and the same oppressive hum of Virginia's Apartment, sets a great atmosphere! Not much to say here other than that though. It sounds vaguely hero-esque, like what you would except from a heroes theme that got twisted, which is interesting.

HER ABSCENCE

That oppressive hum is LOUDER and higher pitched sort of? Takes the forefront of the song with other sounds on top that sound kind of like machinery hums, maybe of the lights and the freezer isles? The entire ost for Virginia's segment is REALLY GOOD at setting atmosphere but I kind of struggle to pull anything about Virginia herself out from it, other than this is probably how she felt in song form ABOUT having to go outside?

HER PRESENCE

The hum remains once again in the background! Theres tinkling sounds of maybe wind-chimes throughout as well, the entire themeing of her music feels like how you would except mist TO sound if it were a song, which is I guess what Virginia wanted. Theres occassional higher pitched sounds and electrical noises, which is probably the store itself. I like to imagine all the lighter notes (the piano, the wind-chime sounds) are her inner child that just wants to feel safe, loved, and protected, but all these other things distract from it. The threat, the danger, they're always PRESENT. Sometimes in the background you can hear what ALMOST sounds like screaming/screeching but it's very musical? Or light? It's near the beginning I think. Sometimes it also sounds like breathing, to really make it eerie.

NO LOOKING BACK

The hum sounds grainier almost, and swells with the beats. Theres also the sounds of beeping (like the ones that beep when you walk through them) but it's distorted almost. The windchimes remain also, but further apart and in shorter bursts. Not sure what to make of this one right now while I'm typing, I think maybe that all the fear was overwhelming and who Virginia could be without the fear (the windchimes, the lighter pitched notes that would almost be cheerful anywhere else) can't come to the forefront.

MAINTENANCE REQUIRED

Yet another store ambiance music track! I really like these, they're all atmospheric (thats what they're supposed to do, doy, I'm so insightful) and I think this shows why music in games, particularly horror, is important! Not much I can say here beyond that other than it reminds me of industrial fan whirring sometimes.

ELECTRIC EYES

Sounds like metal. That hum is, yet again, one of the louder aspects but as well as this almost grainy scraping. Theres also the electrical humming, makes sense for where this is placed in the store.

IN PARTS (TOY AREA)

THERES THE TINKLING AGAIN! This segment makes me realize I don't think it's windchimes, I think it's one of those tiny toy xylophones you get and tap. I find it SO interesting that Virginia's themes have these like, children's toys sounding parts throughout which I do think points heavily to the fact her inner child was severely traumatized and never fully could let go of adult Virginia, always trying to protect them by worrying about judgement. The darker hum of course being her fear, the constant underlying current that never goes away. I think it's also used in this segment because it is the toy's section, but you don't see any toy xylophones in that area! I wonder if Virginia had one as a child?

POOR VIRGINIA

This plays when listening to her tapes, and I do agree with the sentiment. The windchimes come back, as well as a piano. The hum is still there but less oppressive, quieter, and the piano takes the forefront. It sounds almost playful? It could be happy if it was in a higher key, which I think is important to Virginia's character. Had she been given a better environment, a kinder one that cared FOR her and supported her better and didn't make her care so much about appearance and didn't shove her violently into the spotlight at such a young age, she could have been stabler. Happier. But that's not what happened, and it isn't what she got, and she's the one who had to wreckon with that. Theres also pauses between piano segments in this song, that make it seem as if she's pausing to make sure it's okay to continue, with background elements growing louder in the space inbetween.

EXTRA NOTES

Theres a rorschach test- or at the very least you can see her views via a rorschach test Desmond did with her, you can find it in the bathroom. Her outlooks seem to be fairly negative/relating to her fears, with the final one being what influences her monster form in the mindworld! I think it's neat.

I was kind of worried I wouldn't have much to say on Virginia herself aside from recounting her story and my occassional opinion, but actually in retrospect I do think her being the kind of tutorial character/monster fits her. I imagine after Virginia's trauma she often spent time watching and not leading, too scared of judgement to do much else. In the game she is affected BY what has been happening, the story kind of happens to her instead of her leading it herself. It makes sense with her themeing of 'mist'/ wanting to be in the background, even if it makes it kind of difficult to talk about her and her actions/motives/behaviors. She is still vital and important to this story, even if she was more of a Watcher, as per her monster name suggests. ALSO ALSO! I LOVE HOW EVERYONES SEGMENTS CONNECT SOMEHOW, at the very least 2 characters segments connect! Allen SAW Virginia die! He was just so sleep deprived he thought he was having a nightmare! Theres also a note in a police note how Virginia may have been connected to one of the Homa-Mart employees! I want to re-watch the game and take notes to try to figure out who, unless it explicitly says it somewhere and I forgot/missed it??? THIS GAME IS SO COOL.

ALLEN SHORE